The human heart has hidden treasures,
in secretes kept,
in silence sealed,
the thoughts, the hopes, the dreams, the pleasures,
whose charms were broken if revealed.
Life can be a truly fabulous journey if along the way some charms were broken by you and to you, can't it?
9/14/2008
Tim Russert Died At 58 Today
2008年8月21日，是Martin Luther King, Jr. "I have a dream"演讲的45周年纪念日，在同一天，民主党将正式宣布BarackObama为民主党代表进行大选。当Tim发现这个惊人的巧合，在NBC电视 台直播间向他的同事和全国的电视观众宣布这一消息时，他脸上孩子一般兴奋的表情至今我无法忘怀，因为相信我在听到这个消息时，表情的稚嫩和微笑的纯真不亚 于Tim本人，那个刚刚过完58岁生日，功成名就的NBC副总裁。
怎么也想不到如此巨大的一个存在就这样殒灭了，无法亲自见证今年8月21日历史性的时刻，恐怕是他死前最难以吞下的苦水。看来，Obama必须胜利完成这次大选，在白宫的星条旗前宣誓就职，才能赢得Tim在天堂的微笑了。
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In memory of my favorite news anchor, moderator and political pundit, the golden standard of political journalism in humor and grace, Tim Russert. My condolence to your family. You will be forever sorely missed.
怎么也想不到如此巨大的一个存在就这样殒灭了，无法亲自见证今年8月21日历史性的时刻，恐怕是他死前最难以吞下的苦水。看来，Obama必须胜利完成这次大选，在白宫的星条旗前宣誓就职，才能赢得Tim在天堂的微笑了。
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In memory of my favorite news anchor, moderator and political pundit, the golden standard of political journalism in humor and grace, Tim Russert. My condolence to your family. You will be forever sorely missed.
The Hippocrisy of Atheism
The great Karl Marx and his generations of materialists cherish the idea of atheism. And some, including the famous, righteously believe, as Carl Sagan stated loud and clear, "It's far better to grasp the universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring it is."
Very tempting, isn't it? How courageous you are to be an atheist that you stand alone and face off the reality in confidence and wisdom. And what those who seeks God are really seeking is mere reassurance and satisfaction. It's coward, delusional, irrational and unreasonable.
Next February would mark the 200th anniversary of the birth of Charles Darwin, and the 150th anniversary of the publication of his seminal work, “The Origin of Species.” This would be a day of celebration for the victory of Darwinism and Atheism, a day of reality that casts out the evils generic to religions throughout human history. Exhilarating!!
But I don't know what would Darwin himself say if he knows that Darwinism becomes a celebration and quintessential prove that God doesn't exist, a declaration of death penalty to religious beliefs. Because Darwin himself is at best an Agnostic.
At one time he said, "Agnostic would be the most correct description of the state of my mind."
At another time in his last years, he wrote that he was greatly "challenged by the extreme difficulty, or rather the impossibility, of discovering this immense and wonderful universe, including man with his capacity for looking far backwards and far into futurity, as the result of blind chance or necessity. When thus reflecting I feel compelled to look to a First Cause having an intelligent mind in some degree analogous to that of man; and I deserve to be called a theist."
Make no mistake, I personally believe in evolution and natural selection, but no matter how revolutionary this theory is, it's far from perfection. And I really have no idea how atheists disprove Bible with evolution theory, even if this theory can be perfected.
I also personally believe in the origin of the universe, you know, the "big bang" theory where everything begins. Well, only maybe not everything, but something before the "big bang"?
Even Albert Einstein is a Deist. An unquenchable desire to search for the truth? Or in some other people's words, the reality? I encourage everyone who calls themselves Atheists to be so. Because isn't the question that "Do God really exist?" worth you reflect on? Actually, my own opinion is that this is one of the most important and fascinating questions you have to ask and go after the answer for in your life.
Please, call yourself an Atheist after going into libraries, citing facts, digging into scriptures, learning how other Atheist disprove the ever existence of God. Don't tell me you are an Atheist before doing all these because this is so not intellectual and so not fair to those who took great efforts to seek the truth and finally become Theists.
Now to many of the Atheists, I have to say, you are at best Agnostics.
Very tempting, isn't it? How courageous you are to be an atheist that you stand alone and face off the reality in confidence and wisdom. And what those who seeks God are really seeking is mere reassurance and satisfaction. It's coward, delusional, irrational and unreasonable.
Next February would mark the 200th anniversary of the birth of Charles Darwin, and the 150th anniversary of the publication of his seminal work, “The Origin of Species.” This would be a day of celebration for the victory of Darwinism and Atheism, a day of reality that casts out the evils generic to religions throughout human history. Exhilarating!!
But I don't know what would Darwin himself say if he knows that Darwinism becomes a celebration and quintessential prove that God doesn't exist, a declaration of death penalty to religious beliefs. Because Darwin himself is at best an Agnostic.
At one time he said, "Agnostic would be the most correct description of the state of my mind."
At another time in his last years, he wrote that he was greatly "challenged by the extreme difficulty, or rather the impossibility, of discovering this immense and wonderful universe, including man with his capacity for looking far backwards and far into futurity, as the result of blind chance or necessity. When thus reflecting I feel compelled to look to a First Cause having an intelligent mind in some degree analogous to that of man; and I deserve to be called a theist."
Make no mistake, I personally believe in evolution and natural selection, but no matter how revolutionary this theory is, it's far from perfection. And I really have no idea how atheists disprove Bible with evolution theory, even if this theory can be perfected.
I also personally believe in the origin of the universe, you know, the "big bang" theory where everything begins. Well, only maybe not everything, but something before the "big bang"?
Even Albert Einstein is a Deist. An unquenchable desire to search for the truth? Or in some other people's words, the reality? I encourage everyone who calls themselves Atheists to be so. Because isn't the question that "Do God really exist?" worth you reflect on? Actually, my own opinion is that this is one of the most important and fascinating questions you have to ask and go after the answer for in your life.
Please, call yourself an Atheist after going into libraries, citing facts, digging into scriptures, learning how other Atheist disprove the ever existence of God. Don't tell me you are an Atheist before doing all these because this is so not intellectual and so not fair to those who took great efforts to seek the truth and finally become Theists.
Now to many of the Atheists, I have to say, you are at best Agnostics.
生动
终于又失眠了，夏天末尾的日子总是充满魅惑的。快要开学了，才发现院子里夏日的香气中，萤火虫都不见。该走的都走了，留下自己一个人，望着校园里的回忆， Johnson school的大电视，Dufield Hall的自习室，Slope上的斜阳，还有Anabel Taylor里的那架斯坦威钢琴，哎，美丽的校园不一定是好事。
为什么这仅仅一年的时光会浓缩进这么多东西呢？
又突然的都走掉了。
兔 子把一整卷肖邦的夜曲的谱子一并给我发了过来，21首，高兴的我直掉眼泪，不用非得花钱买了。这两天没干别的，一直在弹那不知opus号的第21首夜曲， 这个曲子应该是肖邦所有曲子中最简单的了吧，今天总算是都能弹下来了，不过还需要起码一周的时间熟练下来。平生弹下来的第一首肖邦，以此为念了。
肖邦的每一首夜曲都像是刚炸出来的冰淇淋，一碰即碎，入口即化，什么叫沁人心脾。但建议是一定不要在晚上听，更不要在晚上弹，否则后果自付。真的睡不着了。夜曲，哎，没见过如此细腻的快乐和悲伤，水一般轻易的的流淌在心灵的夹缝里，怎么能设防呢？
李 云迪的肖邦已经让我感觉不到一切了，都在云层之外呢。让我想起朱自清的散文，朴实无华，感人至深。如此收敛的指缝中却能充溢着那么多感情！神秘的一塌糊 涂。朗朗相比之下真的让我很无奈，那么夸张，表达出的感情不及李的十分之一。估计这就是出生之后才苦练出来的普通人和在娘肚子里就开始弹琴的天才之间的差 距吧。
李云迪在日本现场弹的李斯特－帕格尼尼的<钟>（La Campanella）更是让我四体投地。虽然错了几个音，但那几个错音反而让这个曲子更加活灵活现。这种难度的曲子一般的专业人士都会机械一般的弹下 来，很怕弹错一个音，但李确实不一样，放的很开，投入进很多感情，让整个乐章带着动感和节奏的变化，带着乐趣和生机，使鲁宾斯坦的版本都显得有些呆板了， Evgeny Kissin的就更不能于他们相提并论了，只是存脆的快，却不生动。恩，李云迪的曲子很生动。
“生动”。也应该是做人毕生的追求。
为什么这仅仅一年的时光会浓缩进这么多东西呢？
又突然的都走掉了。
兔 子把一整卷肖邦的夜曲的谱子一并给我发了过来，21首，高兴的我直掉眼泪，不用非得花钱买了。这两天没干别的，一直在弹那不知opus号的第21首夜曲， 这个曲子应该是肖邦所有曲子中最简单的了吧，今天总算是都能弹下来了，不过还需要起码一周的时间熟练下来。平生弹下来的第一首肖邦，以此为念了。
肖邦的每一首夜曲都像是刚炸出来的冰淇淋，一碰即碎，入口即化，什么叫沁人心脾。但建议是一定不要在晚上听，更不要在晚上弹，否则后果自付。真的睡不着了。夜曲，哎，没见过如此细腻的快乐和悲伤，水一般轻易的的流淌在心灵的夹缝里，怎么能设防呢？
李 云迪的肖邦已经让我感觉不到一切了，都在云层之外呢。让我想起朱自清的散文，朴实无华，感人至深。如此收敛的指缝中却能充溢着那么多感情！神秘的一塌糊 涂。朗朗相比之下真的让我很无奈，那么夸张，表达出的感情不及李的十分之一。估计这就是出生之后才苦练出来的普通人和在娘肚子里就开始弹琴的天才之间的差 距吧。
李云迪在日本现场弹的李斯特－帕格尼尼的<钟>（La Campanella）更是让我四体投地。虽然错了几个音，但那几个错音反而让这个曲子更加活灵活现。这种难度的曲子一般的专业人士都会机械一般的弹下 来，很怕弹错一个音，但李确实不一样，放的很开，投入进很多感情，让整个乐章带着动感和节奏的变化，带着乐趣和生机，使鲁宾斯坦的版本都显得有些呆板了， Evgeny Kissin的就更不能于他们相提并论了，只是存脆的快，却不生动。恩，李云迪的曲子很生动。
“生动”。也应该是做人毕生的追求。
The unbearable complex of being
Campaign trail is a baffling and exuberant theater where hatred, betrayal, conspiracy, and lies are spawned and erupted like a poisoned stomach that never slips a chance of farting. But without any sheepish pretense, I find the bodily waste just the cutest thing in the world.
Politics appeals to the dark and secretive facets of lives that are intolerably exhausting and intricately complex. For civilians, politics is as dirty and disgusting, yet at the same time, as revetting as porn. People simply don't possess the ability to vote. But they feel compelled to. So they vote their guts, their biology, their primal instincts. In that sense, politics is porn, or more appropriately put, a reality porn show. It’s like watching a hot couple having sex, through a curtained window, you sneak up on them across the street with your tainted telescope. Morally, you condemn yourself for doing so. But when somebody asks how it feels, you probably will wear on a vulgar grimace and admit with a dramatical modesty: 'it tastes just fine.' Something tastes that fine usually isn’t legal. But who cares. Everybody deserves some guilty pleasure after having lived a rugged junk life on this rotted earth.
Politics is a game of choosing sides. As a free thinker, the rule of choosing sides couldn't be any simpler-----to stand with the one whose farting skill makes their gas more bearable than the other. No issues are black and white. They all have overlapping zone where the color is a bewildering grey. Are you a pro-lifer or are you a pro-choicer? Are you a gun owner or are you a gun hater? There’s no such thing as a clear choice. But there is a such thing called cult, a personality cult. A desire to follow, a zeal to worship and an urge to embrace as early as thousands years ago, have carved a legitimate cognitive recognition of the intelligence level boasted by a human being. We are born to idol, yet easy to be impressed.
That said, it leads to only one thing; nobody eludes the fate of voting their reproductive systems. Nobody.
Politics appeals to the dark and secretive facets of lives that are intolerably exhausting and intricately complex. For civilians, politics is as dirty and disgusting, yet at the same time, as revetting as porn. People simply don't possess the ability to vote. But they feel compelled to. So they vote their guts, their biology, their primal instincts. In that sense, politics is porn, or more appropriately put, a reality porn show. It’s like watching a hot couple having sex, through a curtained window, you sneak up on them across the street with your tainted telescope. Morally, you condemn yourself for doing so. But when somebody asks how it feels, you probably will wear on a vulgar grimace and admit with a dramatical modesty: 'it tastes just fine.' Something tastes that fine usually isn’t legal. But who cares. Everybody deserves some guilty pleasure after having lived a rugged junk life on this rotted earth.
Politics is a game of choosing sides. As a free thinker, the rule of choosing sides couldn't be any simpler-----to stand with the one whose farting skill makes their gas more bearable than the other. No issues are black and white. They all have overlapping zone where the color is a bewildering grey. Are you a pro-lifer or are you a pro-choicer? Are you a gun owner or are you a gun hater? There’s no such thing as a clear choice. But there is a such thing called cult, a personality cult. A desire to follow, a zeal to worship and an urge to embrace as early as thousands years ago, have carved a legitimate cognitive recognition of the intelligence level boasted by a human being. We are born to idol, yet easy to be impressed.
That said, it leads to only one thing; nobody eludes the fate of voting their reproductive systems. Nobody.
9/08/2008
Journal 1
今天终于揭开了已久的迷。我的生命中缺少的东西，不是物质上的，不是命运的，不是精神上的，是行动上的，和意识里的。刚刚明白，打开心门自问，什么是自己缺少的，什么占据了自己的心？缺少的是自我，占据的是他人。我太关注别人的想法了，到了一种嗤之以鼻的境界。就在我打字的这个时刻，揭露自己太过在意别人的想法的缺点的这个时刻，我仍然在潜意识里想象某某人看了这个日志的时候会怎么想？会怎么评价？难道这个日志不是给自己写的么？难道这个日志不是为了观察自我么？如果这样一种日志都要在意别人的想法，那么怎样才不能呢？太过在意，以至于无法真正的，我是说，真正的集中注意力。自私一点，关注自己，让自己成长，接受责任，成为一个男人，杀死心中的男孩。
想到了死亡。照镜子的时候，看着自己的面容，突然发现自己是如此年轻，年轻的脸庞，年轻的身体，但眼神里，是无尽的迷惑和无视。无视死亡无处不在的存在，无视每分每秒的流逝和珍贵，停止了成长。为什么死亡都不会给我带来恐惧呢？我的麻木么？我真的应该开始生活了。
7/28/2008
Solo
莫大一个房子，自己一个人住，同学说这个房子至少值一百五十万美金，原来如此。真不好意思，前两天般家具，把这个一百五十万美金的房子的门给撞坏了，哎！
窗外就是五指湖之一的Cayuga湖，湖水的深度足以激发起人类最丰富的想象，将亿万年前横行于世的怪物搬进脑海，驰骋在深水蛟龙的乱战之中。这湖水跟天空贯通一气，性格乖戾，让天气变幻无常，阴晴转变在瞬息之间。湖面打开的宽阔的视野展现了天空的远大。善变的性格使云彩成为了一个诡异的魔术师，将太阳光线的变化玩弄于鼓掌之中，时而神秘的雾气让水天相接，将朝阳的嫩红恣意浸透；时而交错的云层切割开光束，让阳光象舞台灯一样打在波光粼粼的水面；时而，雨过天晴，夕阳燃烧起整片云层，凝重的红黄让人想起中世纪深沉的油画。
孤独的，我坐在窗前，无病呻吟着易逝的时光，无法打起精神，迎接逼近的申请。救救我，救救我吧。
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